Just another day in paradise...

This is just another Saturday in paradise for me...what does your Saturday look like?

Set alarm to wake up.
Make muffins.
Fix computer.
Start dishwasher.
Start coffee.
Start laundry.
Take muffins out of oven.
Walk past spouse watching fishing. "Getting in shower kids need to get up" I say.
Take quick shower.
Wash hair, shave legs.
Spouse comes in and says (in a slightly elevated voice) "We have to leave in 30 minutes!".
"Yup" I say.
Spouse starts getting dressed.
Offspring still in bed watching tv.
Daughter can't find jeans.
Spouse says "Just handed you jeans".
"Those were mom's jeans".
Find jeans for girl child.
Walk past spouse watching fishing.
Tell children to hurry.
Fix snacks for children.
Spouse comes in saying (in a slightly elevated voice) that we are late, while heating his coffee.
"I'm completely ready." I say.
 Spouse asks if children are ready.
I remind spouse to grab Lacrosse gear as my arms are full.
Spouse forgets Lacrosse gear.
Spouse asks wife (in a slightly elevated voice) why she didn't lock the door, even though wife's hands are full.
Pull in parking lot...spouse looks at clock and says "Hey look at that...right on time!".
Wife kills spouse!!!